Wednesday, October 7
Wednesday, July 29
But remember that it's not about the other side, it's really about the lessons that you learn while on this side of your small business. The lessons of creativity, patience, thanksgiving, giving love when tired, receiving help when you need it, being joyful when life is unbalanced, moving forward when you're lost and a whole host of other lessons that when allowed to build your character will serve you greatly on the other side of success. Enjoy the climb to the top because when you get there there will be another mountain to climb.
This song, sung by Miley Cyrus, is a wonderful reminder.
Wednesday, July 22
It's always inspiring to read about people who followed their heart and became rich! Well this Forbes articles tells us about the TEENAGE entrepreneurs who have done this and became millionaires!
Don't get jealous! Just commit to working your small business until it makes you a millionaire. It's possible for all of us. Just think about it, there's only 5 billion people on earth, and Bill Gates alone is worth 50 BILLION DOLLARS. Potentially, everyone on earth could be a multi-billionaire just off the back of one man! And he would still be the one of richest persons in the world.
Now of course I'm not suggesting that Gates distribute his money to the masses. I'm merely using this illustration to show the abundance of money and why we need not be jealous of the teenagers who learned how to tap into the small business market until it rained millions on their heads.
Go for what your know! And read the article here.
So how do I get past the challenges? How do I keep going when the going gets tough? How do I get back up when I stumble or fall down – and yes, I do fall down, just like everyone else does.
It’s all about the Attitude
I believe the only way to fail is to give up. And I believe in my vision so much that I am willing to keep on getting back up and keep on doing whatever it takes to get there.
This is not a burden. And, it doesn’t even feel like hard work. Because I enjoy working in my business every single day. While I focus on taking action to help me reach my goals, I also focus on enjoying the journey.
I focus on staying present and being open to all of the amazing experiences each day brings. And yes, even the miss-steps and “failures” bring with them great gifts, when you are open to looking at them that way.
Gratitude Trumps Frustration Every Time
It’s when we get so caught up in where we are going, that we are constantly frustrated by the present – because we aren’t where we want to be. However, if you can switch this thinking, and be grateful for where you are, and recognize you’re on a journey and every step is important and valuable, the frustration disappears.
When you accept where you are, is exactly where you’re supposed to be, and you’re open to learning what you need to learn in order to grow and move your business forward, then you position yourself for great success.
But when you are constantly frustrated by where you are, you can’t possibly be open to learning what you need to learn, because your energy is all wrong. You are not open to the possibility that everything that is happening is happening for your benefit, so you are closed off to the lessons and the path that is being laid out in front of you.
When you can learn to be grateful for all that happens, and always ask the question, “What is the higher purpose in this?” it changes everything. Because you will get the answer to that question and THAT is what moves you and your business forward. Whereas when you’re in an energy of constant disappointment and failure, it will simply bring you more disappointment and failure. It’s a vicious cycle.
Stay Focused on Your Vision and Keeping Taking Consistent Action
As I said, the only way to fail is to give up. If you believe in your vision and you know in your heart you’re doing what you’re supposed to be doing, then stay focused on that vision and keep taking consistent action toward it. And be open to the lessons along the way. Everything that doesn’t turn out the way you want, has a lesson that can move you forward, if you are open to it. Your job is to learn and keep getting back up and moving forward. Success will come to you, it’s just that the road may not look like what you expect. But that’s not necessarily a bad thing, because it could be even better than you envisioned!
This was written by my mentor, Debbie LaChusa. Because we have the same vision she articulates my sentiments precisely! Debbie LaChusa is the founder and president of DLC Marketing, Inc. and The National Association of Home-Based Business Moms. She is also the author of The Career-at-Home Mom: Secrets for Earning a Six-Figure Income While Having Time for Your Family. She’s a marketing and home-based business coach and international speaker who has shared the stage with celebrity teachers from “The Secret.” You can register for Debbie’s free special report, “Why Marketing Isn’t Enough” and get a complimentary subscription to her ezine, Stepping Up! at www.debbielachusa.com
Saturday, June 27
On the night of MJ death I donned my highschool Beat It jacket one last time and took this pic.
I know it's not theologically sound to say that my children exist because of Michael Jackson, but let me explain.
I was a Michael Jackson Freak. That's what people called me, that's how I behaved,and that's the name I enjoyed being called. I spent my allowance on every little MJ paraphernalia that I could get my hands on. I was smart enough to save some of the items even though I had NO CLUE that Ebay would be in existance 25 years later! Where's my digital camera?!
Anyho, when I was 11 I BEGGED my parents to let me go to a Jackson5 concert and they did. After the concert, a kid had the towel that Michael had thrown to the audience, and he teasingly yelled throughout the parking lot, "Michael Jackson towel $200!"
I ran up to him, "PLLLLEEEEASSSSSEEE, CAN I TOUCH IT!!!" Yes, I was one of those screaming, crying, snotting, hair pulling, hyperventilating fans, even when watching him on television in my own living room. This day my hysterics carried over from the concert right into the parking lot.
He let me "touch" it, and I rubbed the towel all over my arms and face, becoming intoxicated by the musky smelling, sweat-drenched towel. For years I would go out of my way to track that smell. Every guy who came within 7 feet of me with that smell would have me all over him, greedily inhaling him, dazed and starry-eye asking, "What are you wearing?" And finally at the age of 16 I was able to afford my own bottle of Pierre Cardin! I wore it everyday!
Anyho, as we drove back to Chicago, I sat in the backseat absolutely exhausted from the entire ordeal. I reviewed the day and determined that I was A FOOL!! How could I have Michael Jackson's sweaty towel in my hands and NOT run away with it!! I kept asking myself, "Why didn't I turn and run?! Why didn't I run away with the towel?! I should have ran!! Oh my goodness, how stupid of me!!"
So emotionally distraught was I that I vowed then and there in my 11 year old mind that, "I will never, ever walk away from a situation saying, 'why didn't I?'. I will always do what I want to do!" That childishly expressed thought is better interpreted as, "I will live a life of no regrets" and it has been my motto since I was 11.
So at the age of 21 I started regretting the fact that I did not go to college and enrolled at Loyola University (I chose Loyola because Mark Peterson, a good friend, told me I'll never get in.)
At 23 I started mourning the fact that I was working full-time and only going to school at night. I wanted to experience campus life. So I enrolled at Tuskegee University.
There I found a young man who proposed to me within months of my arrival. We married within months of his proposal. Our first kiss was shared when the Minister pronounced us man and wife and our first child was born nine months later.
All because of a Michael Jackson concert that I went to when I was 11 years old.
Wednesday, June 24
President Obama has called us all to help rebuild our community and our economy by volunteering our services. On this website, United We Serve, you can find opportunities to serve based on your interests and location. You can also register your projects so that others can find you.
As busy as I am, I love the idea that we all are responsible for the rebuilding of our nation and that we do that by something as simple as volunteering. Even the title is motivating, "United We Serve".
Take a look at the 3 min video of 1st Lady Michelle Obama! http://www.serve.gov/
What Are You Going To Do?
Sunday, June 21
The next morning Edison stood outside surveying the wet ashes. He is quoted as having said, "There is great value in disaster. All our mistakes are burned up. Thank God we can start anew."
Can you maintain that kind of attitude in the midst of chaos and disaster? This was not an opportunity to "say something wise". Years upon years of hard work, top-secret experiments, and documentations was GONE. He didn't respond this way because he knew he would be quoted years later. He lost MILLIONS. But he chose to look at it from a different angle! "All our mistakes are burned up. Thank God we can start anew."
3 weeks later he delivered his first phonograph.
How do you view life's disaster?
Saturday, June 20
Power & Fame
Anger & Revenge
These circulate, consciously or unconsciously, in your mind and control what you choose to do and what you refrain from doing.
As a woman who has decided to go against the grain of society and stay home with your children AND try your hand at entrepreneurship at the same time, what is motivating you? Be honest with yourself; it doesn't matter how "spiritual" you are, these nine motivators are part of the human psyche and keep us going, for good or bad. When you are conscious, awake, self-examining you can make these work out for your good.
I'll confess, my entrepreneurial pursuit is fueled by:
LOVE-Love for my children and their children, love for my God-I gotta do what I've been gifted to do, and love for women (not that way!)-to be such powerful beings,too many of us struggle alone, I've got to help!
FINANCIAL GAIN-Our one income household only allowed for the basics.
POWER & FAME -Not from this world, but I do want my great-grandchildren to talk about how, "Great-Grandma, Lady T, prayed and pursued her dream to put a stop to the generational curse of poverty and addiction in our family! Now we have business owners, doctors, senators and a U.S. President in our family! She's an awesome, amazingly wise spiritual woman who's still driving around and helping people at the age of 102!"
FREEDOM-Because of my business I have to travel. It's now more than a "I want to" and therefore (somewhat) relieves my guilt about leaving.
ANGER & REVENGE-It's been implied by society and even uttered by some that I can't be a millionaire; oh yeah, I'll show you!
FEAR-If I don't live out my calling, if I don't do my part to lift my children and theirs from a conformist mindset, if I don't help the women that have been divinely assigned to me... then God help me. God help them! Have mercy on us all!
Do you feel that strongly about your business? Do you see that you are tied to others and they need you to be in position when it's time to meet? Do you understand the affect that your entreprenuerial journey has on you, your children and your children's children? Are you in tuned to the things that are motivating you?
Or is it just me?
Please share what motivates you, it'll help other women better understand themselves. If you're on Facebook just click the link so that your comment shows on the blog.
Sunday, June 14
I do, but I have to admit I haven't lately.
Why not you ask?
Because it's so great! Twitter is wonderful for making connections with people but I love it more for all the wonderful information that's available! Someone is always posting some type of report, some interesting news, a free downloadable thingy, an article; SOMETHING that sends me running around on the internet looking, laughing, reading, researching!
I'll login to tweet some encouraging quotes or my words of encouragement-that's all I tweet, because life is good-and the next thing i know it's 1 hour later!
As entrepreneur moms we have to be selective with our time. If the activity doesn't help you get closer to your goals cut back on the time you spend on it or cut it out altogether.
I had to cut Twitter out all together. But I think I'm strong enough to go back in without getting distracted by all of the information...I think...I am. You can find me at http://twitter.com/thebizcoach4mom
How do you handle additive, time consuming, social networking activities like Twitter?
Tuesday, June 9
LinkedIn is the professional version of Facebook. It is an excellent professional networking resource. Many people use it as a job search tool; and entreprenuers use it as a powerful resource in the development, launch and success of their ventures.
On LinkedIn you can join up to 50 user-created groups from a list of thousands, absolutely free of charge. Not only do these groups allow you to connect with group members who could become future partners, customers, investors and employees of your business; but you also have access to the group discussion boards and news sections which provide more networking opportunities, answers to your questions and great advice!
Here are the Top 5 LinkedIn Groups that I believe will be beneficial for entrepreneurs.
1.Start-Up Phase Forum Community for entrepreneurs and small business owners in the startup or startup phase of their own businesses.
2. Bright Ideas and Entrepreneurs A forum for entrepreneurs from all over the world to share bright ideas and insights.
3. eMarketing Association Network - Largest marketing community on LinkedIn for all professionals interested in new internet marketing ideas, strategies and tactics.
4. LInked Business Strategists - Network for professionals exchanging knowledge and helping entrepreneurs and startups find and evaluate the right strategies for their businesses worldwide.
5. Entrepreneur’s Network - Community for current and aspiring entrepreneurs offering a place to find answers, ask questions and connect with people in this space.
If you haven't already, join LinkedIn today and connect with me at http://www.linkedin.com/in/thebusinesscoachformoms.
Monday, June 8
There are times when I'm not feeling the love; times when I give so much I'm not trying to give anymore.
My children all have their agendas and needs. My husband, God bless him, works 10-12 hours a day in restraurant management. His first love, calling and passion is Pastoring. But since the congregation is still growing he has had to go back to the restraurant to supplement his income.
This means that I'm primarily the one who chauffers, delegates, disciplines, cooks, cleans, oversees, yells, and takes care of the house, children, garden, landscape and homeschool. (He does handle the groceries and finances.) All of this in addition to my coaching business. So on Saturdays I want to leave the home to go sit at my other office-WholeFoods-and plan my week, veg out, catch up on some work....reathe. He usually has that same plan for himself.
Most of the time our oldest son has something going on, so he's not home to babysit and because we live away from our family we don't have a family member to drop them off. I don't like asking friends to babysit our 5 kids all day on a Saturday. (Yes, I'm gone ALL DAY, from noon until 8pm, when I can get away with it
So the question is how should we handle this? I don't want to alternate weekends and to be honest I don't want to compromise-which is a very RARE stance for me. So every Saturday I leave and don't care. Am I being selfish? Leave your honest comments.
Monday, May 25
This first one is Dave Ramsey giving great advice on how and why to start a biz NOW. It's only 3 min long.
The next one is Rich Sloan, the owner of Start-Up Nation, and he's talking about the success of mom entrepreneurs. It's only 6min long.
Here 2 new entreprenuers talk about how they built their businesses. It's about 6 mins.
Here 3 women talk about their buisness and marketing challenges. It's about 7 min long.
Open Mike Night helps entrepreneurs develop their ideas. It's 6 mins.
Finally, I posted my first free audio coaching program! It's my desire to have 8-10 free down loadable audio programs and then several that are available for purchase. But doing it takes time. It took me more than a month, but I'm going to get better and better and it will take me 1-2 weeks to shoot out a program...I hope.
The free coaching program is available on my website and it's called Cat Eye Focus, Helping You Maintain The Vision for Your Business. As mom entrepreneurs we have so many things to juggle and we tend to take care of everyone and their schedules first so our "thing" gets put on the back burner. Sometimes we do this even with our business plans and we try to make up for it in the middle of the night.
Even as I type this I just received a call from my 2 older sons asking can they go bowling with some friends. They were told to go to the friends' house for 2 hours and come back. I was going to cook dinner, feed the babies and when they returned I would leave to go to my "other office"-the coffee shop around the corner. However I just agreed to them going bowling so my "other office" will be closed when they return. That means I won't get much done today and I'm still tired from the weekend, so I won't be able to stay up late tonight!
Events like this occur to entrepreneur moms several times a week, so when you finally get a chance to work you've lost some of the great ideas, lost some of the enthusiasm, or you have so many little things to catch up on that you become inefficient.
If you have this struggle than you'll want to go to my website The Business Coach for Moms.com and download the free Cat Eye Focus audio coaching program so that you can maintain your vision even in the midst of distractions!
But before you go to download your free audio coaching program, leave me a message here: how do you handle the many distractions that cause you to lose your momentum?
Thursday, May 21
I just read in Ikea's newsletter that (and I am going to plagerize here, cause it will just take me too long to try to say it differently and I'll lose all of my enthusiam):
While it doesn't often make the news, business isn't slowing down for American women. They hold the majority ownership of 7.7 million small businesses and, including co-ownerships with men, own 10.4 million, or nearly half of all businesses, according to the Center for Women's Business Research. Employing almost 13 million and producing $1.9 trillion in sales, women-owned businesses have grown almost twice as fast as all firms in the past decade, according to the U.S. Small Business Administration.
How many times have you "saved the day" for your family? Again, the women save the day; but this time it's for the country!
So,on March 13th, 2009, President Obama signed an executive order creating the White House Council on Women and Girls. The mission of the council will be to provide a coordinated federal response to the challenges confronted by women and girls and to ensure that all Cabinet and Cabinet-level agencies consider how their policies and programs impact women and families.
Yeah baby! We're awesome! WOMEN ENTREPRENEURS are changing the world!
Thursday, May 14
I've found that the saying, "If momma ain't happy, ain't nobody happy" to be quite untrue. Why do people say that? My children, who love me dearly, could care less if I'm happy or not. They're children, their very nature is selfish determination.
As I sit down to work, my 22 mon old, baby girl wants to sit on my lap; I try to redirect her to the couch, to her chair, to her brothers, to the television but she crys and crys. I whine, "Please, Tatianna go sit on the couch with your brothers, pleeeease." She stands there crying undeterred by the rejection.
I put on a strict face, "You can't sit on my lap, so you're just going to have to cry." She does her fast action, run-in-place cry. If she could do that while not crying she might be able to beat her brothers in a foot race.
When I try to explain, "I can't have you on my lap, messing with the computer and throwing my papers on the floor. You'll have to go and look at t.v." She hollars and pulls at her hair.
When I pretend to cry I'm very aware that if I'm not careful I could bloody well start boo-hooing and pulling out my hair too. But she is totally oblivious to the looney bin-line in the sand that I'm about to cross. Her screams come out as higher pitch shrills, her running feet takes her in circles and she yanks harder at her hair.
As soon as I pick her up she smiles, squeezes my neck with a sweet hug, lays her head on my shoulder and wimpers a "tank you". As soon as I feel the love oozing from her little body and begin thinking about how mean I am to reject my young baby girl, she turns around and starts to bang on my computer keys like a little monkey!
I'm going to change the saying to "If momma ain't happy, so what! Just keep screaming until you get what makes YOU happy." Oh well, at least one of us is happy.
What about at your house? Do they really care if momma ain't happy?
Monday, May 4
Thursday, April 30
I was recently asked what's the difference between "a business coach" and "a business coach for moms"? "What makes you so great?"
Glad you asked!
1. I realize that Mompreneurs have to be handled with cotton gloves. As much as we love business, feel "called" to the business or need to make money with the buiness, if it occupies too much time away from the children or too much money from the family budget we start backpeddling with Mom-Guilt. So I encourage, guide, push and motivate as if I'm coxing a powerful and beautiful lioness out of her cage and into the jungle. She can handle the jungle, but she doesn't know it yet. I don't want her to turn back to the safety and confines of the cage.
2. I email my Mommy clients an outline of our discussions, including the list of goals with the agreed upon dates of completion. This is to help the lioness stay focused. There are many distractions calling her; the cubs back in the cage and many other business ideas in the jungle. My follow-up email is printed and hung in her home office to be her visual anchor.
3. I also set my coaching hours to accomandate Mommy hours. Most Moms can't get to the phone during the 9-5 hours. The zoo is too busy. We come out of our cage to explore the JungleBusiness after hours. I talk with many of my clients either early in the a.m. or very late at night. This works well for me too because I also live in a zoo. I talk with my business coach at 3pm every other week. She is wonderful but not a mom-God bless her childless soul-so I drive down the street and sit in a church parking lot just to have a focused, uninterrupted conversation. How many coaches will schedule 11:00pm as your weekly appointment?
4. I request/demand that my clients come to the meeting as a Business Woman not a Business Mommy. In other words she cannot talk to me while fixing lunch, or doing laundry. The only thing that I will tolerate is breastfeeding her infant. This is to remind her to honor her business. Most moms are not always able to give her business full attention and many aren't taken seriously. During our sessions she has someone on the phone who honors her business and honors her as a business woman. This gives her the permission to do the same. In order to hunt successfully in the jungle she has to see herself as the true lioness that she is; this lioness is proud to hold up the mirror.
For the sake of time I won't go into all of my other "greatness" secrets. If you're interested in being coached by someone who loves building and supporting moms in their entrepreneurial pursuits, email me at LadyT@TheBusinessCoachforMoms.com
Tuesday, April 28
Anyho, this weekend I read Am*bitch*ous by Debra Condren, Ph.D. Even though I don't use the "B" word I thought it was intriging, the way she captured it into her titled.
This is a must-read for all women. I'm a self-assured and confident woman. My relationship with my Creator is the source of my confidence and decisions. I'm naturally outgoing and had a good child-hood so no self-esteem issues there. But I stuggle balancing my natural desire to be ambitious and take over the world with my maternal desire to be a quiet, content, stay-home mom. The mom-guilt regularly sits me down. Periodically, it has sat me down for months at a time!
Well Debra Condren, Ph.D says there is no balance and I need to stop looking for it and trying to make it happen. "Struggle and imbalance are a normal part of life; balance is not normal." "...in order to be the best you can be and to acheive greatness, you need to be myopic...you have to have laser-beam focus on your work."
Something I knew intuitively and something I've said while coaching clients laden with mom-guilt. But this was the first time that I read it! Yippeee! I'm free!!
Saturday, April 18
Wednesday, April 15
Combine your vacation and business trip. For example: I just spent 3 days and 3 nights at a local hotel so that I could start writing my book. What a nice break from the responsibilities of home and what a nice tax write-off at the end of the year!
What is your best financial tip/advice? Leave it here.
Tuesday, April 14
To know how many people lost their jobs and how bad the economy is, help me to be sympathic toward people and their loss, but too much of that information becomes a distraction on how I run my business. I can't coach and encourage WAHM to success if I'm also thinking of the "failing" economy. And the mom entrepreneurs that I've coached have gone on to do great things despite the "bad" economy. Why? Because we never entertain the conversation.
If you're tired of the bad news check out happynews.com. Great information that will make you smile and keep you encouraged!
Tuesday, April 7
So many women are resentful at people because "people" have let them down or disappointed them. However, when I have them to talk more about it, they have never truly communicated what they wanted.
You must open your eyes, grow up, come to an understanding, take responsibility...whatever you want to call it...stop living in your world and realize that everyone comes from a different place, a different background, a different mindset, different relationships. When dealing with a good majority of people always assume that there are no set standards and be willing to express your wants and needs. Express them directly. Express them often.
How can they "let you down" when they only had a vague understanding of what you expected from them? Their vague understanding was based solely on their interepration of your relationship and their experiences with other people in similar relationships.
Now, of course, there are many cavaets to this. Some people are stuck on selfish and they aren't trying to give you what you need. Some aren't obligated to give you what you need. Some are incapable of giving you what you need. Assess the situation.
Because, if you have a need you have the right to respectfully express it to anyone you choose.
But remember you are OBLIGATED to express it DIRECTLY, TRUTHFULLY and CANDIDLY. If you don't then save your anger and resentment for another occasion with another person.
Monday, April 6
I think I've said this before on video...oh yeah, here it is.
Saturday, March 28
But I decided to get over it. There's so much great info on the net and this article is one of them. She lists many places on the web where you can get things for free. Read it here: http://green.yahoo.com/blog/the_conscious_consumer/53/how-to-find-free-stuff.html
Thursday, March 26
To help her move along, we refocused on her target market, mission and vision statements. I talked her through a visualization activity that reminded her of her strengths and gave her a nightly assignment. Once reminded of her potency she was ready to resume the pursuit of her weekly goals.
But once again I was reminded of how our minds can make life, troubles, our weaknesses, seem so much bigger then they truly are.
Then I found this video. The card trick is a great visual of that point. Adrian Law also addresses how to deal with the negative thinking and the benefit of a coach.
Tuesday, March 24
Get a different perspective here: http://www.mothering.com/articles/body_soul/inspiration/the-audacity-of-help.html
Read it here: http://snipr.com/e5vau
Saturday, March 14
Nuggets of wisdom part my lips, milk springs forth from my breasts (well...before my mastectomy), love and discipline radiates from my hands (yes, discipline! I said it!). Love and strength emmanates from my being. I am Expeller of generational curses and Propeller of the next generation.
Having proclaimed all of that, why can't I get my 3yr old to stop crying!
My 4th born son is the sweetest, easiest, gentle-est child of them all! UNTIL...he gets sleepy and wants something. Then he starts crying and you CAN NOT shut him up. You can't distract him. You can't tickle him. You can't hold him. You can't threaten him. You can't kiss him. You can't make him laugh. You can't give him what he wants. You can't take away what he doesn't. There is absolutely NOTHING (yet discovered) that can be done with him. We have all tried and he gives us the opportunity to try again often enough.
It's very irratating (but also pretty funny) because he keeps his mouth open the ENTIRE 30-60 minutes that he's crying. The long string of clear drool is hanging from his bottom lip and snot is sliding from his nose down into his mouth. Whatever started the upset is continuously repeated throughout the 30-60min. "I dont wanna dake off my shoes!" or "I wanna toe to MicDon-olds!" or "I want..." whatever the 5yr has. And it goes on and on and on.
Back in the day, the child would have been spanked (whupped) and told to shut up. And the child would shut up.
But we, the New Age, New Millennium, New Aquarius, Newly Evolved and Enlightened mothers, can't do that. We have to try to reason with a small human that doesn't understand reasoning nor common sense, for that matter. How do you reason with a crying, snotting, drooling, shorty who wants to take his shoes off in the dang-gone snow?
Now, I believe in allowing the lovely children the opportunity to make new discoveries-whatever the consequences may be. If they fall and hurt themselves, they would have learned The Lesson. If they bump their chins and bite their tongues, they would have learned The Lesson. If they freeze their little toesies off, they would have learned The Lesson. And The Lesson in my house is:
But reasoning and learning lessons are outside of the conscious awareness of a crying 3yr old. This leaves the Rational, New Millennium, All-Wise QueenMother a small, frustrated, bewildered mommy. Once I even resorted to the Old-School method of spanking him (at the advice of my mother) but that didn't work! He cried more intensely and I brokeout into tears. How confusing is that? What kind of Queen am I?
Dethroned, where I often sit! As I sit nursing his wounds I lovingly repeat The Lesson. But of course he can't hear it. He's still crying!
Monday, March 9
After several days, I found a perfect picture but they wanted $100 for it! I decided to call my photographer over and asked her to recreate the same picture using the items on my desk. The result is the new and improved banner that you see above. Since my photographer is a mom that I coach we were able to barter our services. She's doing what she loves to do, take pictures for me. And I'm doing what I love to do, coaching a motivated momtrepreneur to success!
If you're looking to spend money, stop and look around you. Oftentimes you can get creative and just work with what you got!
Tuesday, March 3
In this fast-paced, busy, go-go world, it's easy for mom entrepreneurs to get stressed-out by our committments, children and challenges. It's easy to forget that life is suppose to be fun and exciting. Our children remind us of this all the time, but we're "too busy". They're "too silly". And excitment makes "too much of a mess."
Mommy, here is a great tip to remember: laughter is a precious gift for a crazed society. The mental and physcial benefits are numerous! When you laugh endorphins and adrenaline are released into your blood stream. This helps build your immune system, remove stress hormones, and gives you a natural high. Laughter tightens your stomach muscles. It improves blood circulation and increases blood oxygenation. It lowers blood pressure. It is LITERALLY, medicine.
Laughter also improves memory by helping us to retain information; something that great teachers and advertisers always capitalize on. It boosts our emotional state of mind allowing us to see things in a different light. This opens up our creativity and problem-solving abilities.
It's free, natural and culturally acceptable for both men and women. Go ahead laugh until your belly aches! LOL!
Saturday, February 28
If you can but tap into your Unlimited Creator who created all things, this will take care of your fears, doubts and worries.
You say, "But Lady T, I have tapped into the Unlimited Creator, I know him personally through Jesus Christ, or Budda or by reading The Koran."
I say, then why are you still crying? Why are you still worried? Why are you still wondering how it's going to work out?
Monday, February 23
How do you know when you're not supporting yourself?
If you are:
- unwilling to put in the time-you can say, "I'm too tired because I have the children and I have to walk the monkey and clean off the picture frames..." or "I can't because my husband won't paint the windows or babysit the gorilla ...", or whatever the excuse; if you are spending more time talking about that, then looking for ways around that, then you're not supporting yourself.
- unwilling to spend money because you're afraid that, "the business won't work". Or "it will be something else that I start and don't finish"...or whatever the excuse; if you're afraid that it won't work then it won't and you can't expect someone else to support you in an endeavour that you are afraid to support.
"Whatever shall I do Lady T?"
I'll gladly tell you. You have two options:
- Be honest with yourself about your fears and doubts and then GET TO WORK.
2. Be honest with yourself about your fears and doubts and step away from the business until you have dealt with your fears and doubts.
If you need help with either one then feel free to email me LadyT@TheBusinessCoachforMoms.com.
Saturday, February 21
Listen and read up all entrepreneur women over the age of 35: You absolutely, must, without a shadow of a doubt, unequivocally, definitly, H to the ECKY yeah, gotta have a website!!!
The business card use to be the item that told the world that one is serious about his business. Now it's the website. You will not be taken seriously without one.
I know that means a whole new set of learning skills and another expense but it's not that bad. There are FREE, people-friendly, sites available out there. Do a search or just go to Weebly and get started. If you're a Mommy entreprenuer, wanting to grow your business and taking so seriously by your customers that they'll pay you money, then you must have a website.
Thursday, February 19
I don't know! Is it genetically embedded into our female bodies? My husband never feels remorse when he has to leave. Somedays he doesn't even say good-bye. He just runs!
He NEVER lingers around for another round of kisses and hugs. He NEVER stops at the door and comes back to check and see if he should change a diaper. He would NEVER, EVER, EVER, put on his clothes, gather his lap top, and after taking one last look at the sad faces, and the messy room decide it's just easier to stay home!
Why do we do that?!
I don't know; but I do know that I've decided to get me some balls!
That's right. I'm going to act like a man and go to work when I need to go to work!
To All Mommy Entrepreneurs: Your business is just as important as the man's job!
Because you're growing and developing as a human being and as a woman. And every man will tell you that's sexy.
Because you're contributing to the family's finances, even if it's barely $5 a month, it will grow if you stick to it and continue to learn. Anyway, your business creates a lot of tax deductibles for the family.
Because you're teaching the observing children entrepreneurial skills.
Because you're building a family leagacy.
Now let go of the guilt, get some balls and go to work!
Saturday, February 14
He 's now sleeping contently after being properly thanked.
Now I sit in the den surrounded by my children. My oldest is on his computer 4 inches to my left. The other 3 boys are making and cutting out valentine cards; I have 12. (I'm completely ignoring the mess of construction paper, crayons, markers, glue, etc. on the floor trailing out to the school room.) My baby girl is happily, walking around taste testing the markers whenever she gets a chance.
I only have a couple of business calls to make, a few client emails to send out and then I'm off to my son's play (He's Doody in Grease). When I return my husband and I will catch a late dinner and a movie.
I will relish in this day of love.
Thursday, February 12
How do we honor our dreams, talents, and clients when there's a 2 year old who wants no one but you and a 14 year old who has to be chauffered to her many extracurricular activites?
All of my clients ask the same question, in one form or another, "should I wait until the child/children get older?" Ultimately you have to do what feels right for you, but know that even moms with teenagers ask the same question.
I advise that you not make the decision to quit because it's "too hard", or "I'm too tired". You're going to experience that with 2 children or 7. Don't quit because, "I feel guilty." You're going to experience that when they are age 2 or age 17. Don't quit because, "I don't have enough time." EVERYONE is experiencing that.
Learn some time management skills. Eat better so that you can maintain your energy and learn how to let go of the guilt by getting a different perspective. Network with another entrepreneur for accountability and support or hire a coach. But whatever you do, DON'T QUIT!
Tuesday, February 10
#1 listen, #2 be honest with ourselves and #3 make a decision.
#1 Listen: Simply ask yourself the question: Why am I procrastinating on this? Very simple but we don't alway flow with the simple. We usually entertain condemning conversations with ourselves: "Im always procrastinating!" "Im just lazy!" "Why am I so stupid!" "Why can't I just do it?!" "I hate procrastinators and now I'm doing it!"
I see this as a little Condemning Demon on my back trying to distract me from enjoying life. I get him off by not resisting him with arguments to defend me.
The issue is, "Why am I procrastinating on THIS?" Sit still to listen. Negative, self-condemning statements will come to your mind. Don't resist them. Continue sitting and wait for the truth to come forth.
So you'll ask the question and you'll hear an angry respose like, "because you're lazy!" to which you'll respond, "maybe, but why am I procrastinating on THIS?"
"because I'm just a procrastinator, I've always been...." interrupt the thought with a loving, accepting, "maybe, but why am I procrastinating on THIS?"
Continue asking the question with love and acceptance; with the object of procrastination at the center of the question and not yourself until the little condemning demon quiets down and the truth comes forth.
#2 Then, you must be willing to be honest with yourself. There are many reasons for procrastinating and you have to decide what you're going to do when the answer comes forth.
don't want to accept the responsibilites that will result
just don't want to do it
Tuesday, February 3
My fans follow me everywhere. Michael's fans may follow him from city to city but my fans follow me from room to room! Sometimes they trip me up as they anticipate my next step. They track my location, they sniff me out, they call me on my cell phone. They insist that I come home, or stop cooking, or "pick me up", "let me in", or "play with me"...they adore me! AARRRGH!
Even though I only have 5, they are everywhere! I can't escape them. Sometimes I'll step out the bathroom and find a group of the younger ones standing there at the door clapping and cheering. A couple of the older ones are sprawled across my bed waiting to pounce on me for conversation. They just love being in my presence!
Unlike Michael Jackson, I do things for my fans that he would never do for his: I chauffer them around. I pick their boogers. I buy them things. I wipe their butts. I fix their meals.
Wait, am I a rock star or an enslaved mom?
I'm a Rock Star, baby! A R-O-C-K ST-R!!
Tito, get me some water. Oh, you can't reach it? Then I'll get it. (sigh)
Most stars are wearing clothes created by someone else. I wear a style all my own. In the morning I do a quick wash up and pull sweats over my satin p.j.s. FUNKY FRESH BABY! No time for a shower the fans are already up and demanding to see me. They just love me!
Thursday, January 29
And surprisingly people still fall for it. Why people why? Haven't we heard the saying, "if it sounds too good to be true it probably is"? Didn't parents teach that to us in our early informative years? Or maybe you had a parent that was out there chasing the "too good to be true" thing and so you didn't get that lesson.
We have all seen that the ones who chase the "too good to be true" thing tend to be the lazy, want something for nothing types (a fool and his money are soon parted) OR they are the ones who are tired of working so hard and become vulnerable.
After my 5th baby my weight didn't drop back as quickly as it usually does. As a matter of fact she's 18 mos old and Im still 30lbs heavier than my normal 125. At a certain point I got desparate and where I use to laugh at the commercials that said, "Eat all the pizza, burgers, fries and steaks you want and you can still lose 50lb and you don't even have to exercise!" I found my ears perking up. And then one afternoon it even made sense. "Yes, a special formula designed to attack your fat gobules! Ingenius! I need that!!!"
You could have classified me as the lazy, want something for nothing type! But my senses came back to me before my money parted!
Anyho, when it comes to entreprenuership you're going to have to:
1. Work hard. Business is like a baby it requires nuturing and time to grow. You'll reap the benefits in the end (the end could be 2yrs from now or 10).
2. Maintain your focus. With the many details of day to day life plus the many details of babies and children this is very difficult.
3. Operate with courage, determination and persistence while being flexible and open to change. That sentence alone is hilarious. Trying to do it can teeter you on the border line of insanity.
4. Constantly learn. Keeping up with the changing technolory is cruicial and exhausting. Fortunately for me I have a teenager that I go to. I feel like an old lady begging the young man for mercy crumbs, "Pardon me sonny, but can you teach me how to convert a Youtube video and upload it onto my site? I'se be much obligied. " But hey, whatever it takes to keep up with the changing times.
Money will come but only after you have faithfully worked at these (there are other requirements, but I'll save those for another post). I love being a business coach because I help people, particularly people like me, Mommy Entrepreneurs, work faithfully at their goals. I help them maintain focus, encourage them to be persistent, and continue to work hard for what they want. When they've done that and the money starts rolling in, "Oh Happy Day!"
Money will come but you must work, focus, persist, and learn before it'll will show itself to you.
And stay away from the hype!
Wednesday, January 28
When I first started speaking and training on a national level I had the opportunity to sit under some pretty famous and popular speakers; Brain Tracey, Jack Canfield, Les Brown, Tony Robbins just to name a few. I remember feverishly taking notes on how to "fill your appointment book with 300 speaking engagments per year." Two days later, I was feeling pretty stressed about all I had to do and when I prayed it brought me to my senses: I DON'T WANT 300 SPEAKING ENGAGEMENTS PER YEAR!
I had gotten side-tracked by all of the compliments of my seminars, gotten enamored with the traveling and nice hotels. More than anything, I had gotten giddy about not having to constantly change diapers and pick out their little boogers. I was delirious with joy that I didn't have to figure out what's for dinner and try to remember if I had refilled the ice trays!
So delirious that I allowed someone else to define success for me.
I am now VERY clear on my own definition.
I do a lot of self-reflection. I'm constantly presenting myself (mentally) before my Creator to check my intentions, desires, and thoughts. My constant question: Am I walking in LOVE or Am I walking in FEAR in 4 areas: my relationships, my business, my children, my spiritual growth.
When I allow fear to control my behaviors I feel guilty, or doubtful, or nervous or angry....like a failure. Example behaviours: hanging on to my children because "they grow so fast" or not moving in my business or not extending myself to people because "they'll suck up my time".
When I allow love to control my behaviors I feel liberated, joyful, I trust more, I give more. I feel like anything's possible...I feel successful. Example behaviours: trying something new, letting go of an argument even though I'm right, taking time to encourage someone who's lost hope, giving my last, doing what I believe pleases God.
It has nothing to do with money, a busy schedule, popularity or other external forces. I'm my only judge and no one even knows when my judging takes place. I'm successful when I am operating in love. When my intentions, desires and thoughts are focused on doing right and good. When I keep vigilance on those things then business flows, relationships clear up and of course I'm growing spiritually.
How do you measure success?
Sunday, January 25
This bi-racial man rose from a home without a father and a missing mother; he was raised by his white grandparents in an obscure city in Hawaii. No one in his family is a politician. No one in his family is rich. Yet with vision, hope and help from God and his fellow-men he has made history!
What about you?
What are the issues in life that you must get past in order to move to the next level in your life or your business; to move on to better places and positions; whatever that may be for you?
Entrepreneurship may not be a part of your family history but if the urge is in you act on it and go boldly!
Whatever excuses you have used in the past it's time to let go of them. There's a change in the air. The election of an African-American in a country that is still troubled by racism says that the tides are turning. The joy, hope and expectation that's in the air, AROUND THE WORLD, because of this one man's election is electrifying! Capitalize on the change in energy and do what you've been called to do! Do it boldly! Do it with all of your might! Do it without fear! Do it with fear, just do it!