How Should I Handle This?

There are times when I'm not feeling the love; times when I give so much I'm not trying to give anymore.

My children all have their agendas and needs. My husband, God bless him, works 10-12 hours a day in restraurant management. His first love, calling and passion is Pastoring. But since the congregation is still growing he has had to go back to the restraurant to supplement his income.

This means that I'm primarily the one who chauffers, delegates, disciplines, cooks, cleans, oversees, yells, and takes care of the house, children, garden, landscape and homeschool. (He does handle the groceries and finances.) All of this in addition to my coaching business. So on Saturdays I want to leave the home to go sit at my other office-WholeFoods-and plan my week, veg out, catch up on some work....reathe. He usually has that same plan for himself.

Most of the time our oldest son has something going on, so he's not home to babysit and because we live away from our family we don't have a family member to drop them off. I don't like asking friends to babysit our 5 kids all day on a Saturday. (Yes, I'm gone ALL DAY, from noon until 8pm, when I can get away with it

So the question is how should we handle this? I don't want to alternate weekends and to be honest I don't want to compromise-which is a very RARE stance for me. So every Saturday I leave and don't care. Am I being selfish? Leave your honest comments.

If Momma Ain't Happy...

I've found that the saying, "If momma ain't happy, ain't nobody happy" to be quite untrue. Why do people say that? My children, who love me dearly, could care less if I'm happy or not. They're children, their very nature is selfish determination.

As I sit down to work, my 22 mon old, baby girl wants to sit on my lap; I try to redirect her to the couch, to her chair, to her brothers, to the television but she crys and crys. I whine, "Please, Tatianna go sit on the couch with your brothers, pleeeease." She stands there crying undeterred by the rejection.

I put on a strict face, "You can't sit on my lap, so you're just going to have to cry." She does her fast action, run-in-place cry. If she could do that while not crying she might be able to beat her brothers in a foot race.

When I try to explain, "I can't have you on my lap, messing with the computer and throwing my papers on the floor. You'll have to go and look at t.v." She hollars and pulls at her hair.

When I pretend to cry I'm very aware that if I'm not careful I could bloody well start boo-hooing and pulling out my hair too. But she is totally oblivious to the looney bin-line in the sand that I'm about to cross. Her screams come out as higher pitch shrills, her running feet takes her in circles and she yanks harder at her hair.

As soon as I pick her up she smiles, squeezes my neck with a sweet hug, lays her head on my shoulder and wimpers a "tank you". As soon as I feel the love oozing from her little body and begin thinking about how mean I am to reject my young baby girl, she turns around and starts to bang on my computer keys like a little monkey!

I'm going to change the saying to "If momma ain't happy, so what! Just keep screaming until you get what makes YOU happy." Oh well, at least one of us is happy.

What about at your house? Do they really care if momma ain't happy?

Celebrate Your Small Victories

Work at home moms, entrepreneur women, this is a hilarious illustration of the need to celebrate your own success! Even when you're losing, even when things aren't going your way, you should celebrate the smallest victory. That ONE little, bitty victory is a sign that things are on the way up!

Here's A Great Tax Tip for Entrepreneurs

Combine your vacation and business trip. For example: I just spent 3 days and 3 nights at a local hotel so that I could start writing my book. What a nice break from the responsibilities of home and what a nice tax write-off at the end of the year!

What is your best financial tip/advice? Leave it here.

Do You Need Help?

Interesting article about our, western perspective vs. the African perspective, of child-rearing. We struggle too much, trying to accomplish everything by ourselves. No wonder the need for anti-depressive drugs is so high.
Get a different perspective here: http://www.mothering.com/articles/body_soul/inspiration/the-audacity-of-help.html

Help Yourself!

For every day that we whine and cry about the lack of support that we haven't received, we could be working on our businesses. To be honest, NO ONE HAS TO SUPPORT YOU. That includes parents, spouse and children. The only one responsible for supporting you and your business ideas is YOU! If you're not supporting yourself don't expect anyone else to do it.

How do you know when you're not supporting yourself?

If you are:

• unwilling to put in the time-you can say, "I'm too tired because I have the children and I have to walk the monkey and clean off the picture frames..." or "I can't because my husband won't paint the windows or babysit the gorilla ...", or whatever the excuse; if you are spending more time talking about that, then looking for ways around that, then you're not supporting yourself.
• unwilling to spend money because you're afraid that, "the business won't work". Or "it will be something else that I start and don't finish"...or whatever the excuse; if you're afraid that it won't work then it won't and you can't expect someone else to support you in an endeavour that you are afraid to support.

"Whatever shall I do Lady T?"

I'll gladly tell you. You have two options:

1. Be honest with yourself about your fears and doubts and then GET TO WORK.

OR

2. Be honest with yourself about your fears and doubts and step away from the business until you have dealt with your fears and doubts.

If you need help with either one then feel free to email me LadyT@TheBusinessCoachforMoms.com.

ARE U CRZY!

I have been asked by several clients, all over the age of 35, if it's really necessary to have a website? My answer is always a polite ARE U CRZY?
Listen and read up all entrepreneur women over the age of 35: You absolutely, must, without a shadow of a doubt, unequivocally, definitly, H to the ECKY yeah, gotta have a website!!!

The business card use to be the item that told the world that one is serious about his business. Now it's the website. You will not be taken seriously without one.

I know that means a whole new set of learning skills and another expense but it's not that bad. There are FREE, people-friendly, sites available out there. Do a search or just go to Weebly and get started. If you're a Mommy entreprenuer, wanting to grow your business and taking so seriously by your customers that they'll pay you money, then you must have a website.